UMGIDI

So much happened during my son's homecoming ceremony (umgidi). The highlight was when the elders told me to do a ritual which symbolises that me and my husband we will never again have a son going to the bush (ukulahla isitshixo). We were warned that if we do the ritual, it means we are sure not to have any more children (as if we're thinking of that, at 50, can I have a bun in the oven? No ways!!!).

I had to have a napkin (new of course, I no longer have my son's) and a bottle of gin. I had to lead in a traditional song (mhh, my sister in law helped me here), she sang a very nice song " u-Ayabulela ligqibelo lam!" -'Ayabulela is my last born'. We went out of the house into the street.

Outside, all women who had gone threw the same process (having children gone to the bush) took part in the ritual, others were standing singing and clapping for us. Those identified women threw the bottle of gin amongst themselves, like passing ball in a netball match. They had to make sure the bottle does not fall and break, otherwise gone is the drink for those who want to drink 'old buck gin'.

After the 1st song I laid the gin on the napkin while other women continued to sing. After a while I opened the gin and poured it on the napkin and lit it with a matches. All the time we were singing and dancing, while I held the napkin burning.The remains of the napkin had to be taken to the kraal (enkundleni) for burning it finished. I was told the remains should not be lying around (to avoid my son being bewitched!!!).

The remaining 'Old Buck gin' was shared amongst women who had done this ceremony for their sons too. Shame, some of my friends had to just cheer on while the spotlight was on women with boys that are already men! It was an experience that we all enjoyed.

I need to post photos but I don't know how!!

Why I have conversationa?

I am one of those people who does not shy away from starting a conversation. Luckyly I have not yet encountered a person who shuts me up. Maybe its because my conversations are interesting and worth listening to.

My career dictates that I talk all the time. Even if I did not take the Corporate Communicatione line for a job, I would still be expected to talk non-stop. The big question is, why do I have conversations. I have been writing about being talkative but the question is about conversations.

There is a difference between talking and engaging in a conversation. A conversation has a meaning, there is another person involved (though you can have conversations with yourself). I have conversationas because I like to engage people, talk about different issues. I believe from any converastion you can learn something.

Many times I have learnt one or two things from conversations I have with my sons. There are also conversations that one needs to avoid or ignore, such as people that start conversations just for the sake of wanting to cause chaos or harvock.

I am also good at ignoring irritating conversations, but when I converse, it is with a purpose.
 

A MOTHER'S LIFE IS NEVER DULL

Everybody is talking about the end of year, how they going to rejoice having finished BTech! Lovely and good for them. But for me I still have a lot in my plate. There is definitely nothing for me to rejoice at this moment.

I have worries that will probably end late in December or in January for that matter. You ask yourself, 'What is your story now Sis Theo?'. Mine is a long story, which started the Friday my son went to school for the last time, attending their Valedictory. Now is the time to be serious, if the child has not been serious the throught the year, staying at home to prepare for exams is really a trying period that need to be used strategically.

Wow, my son, like his mother (mwha) is not really an A student not even a B, we have to work hard to get decent results. But at the moment his description and mine of working hard are totally different, this is point no.1 that is in my plate, I can not help it, I seem to be more anxious about his exams than he is. I pray all the time for the Lord to give me calmness. Are all mothers stressing at this time?

Next on my plate is the fact that the same son is going to the bush as soon as he finished his exams. That is stressing in multiples!!. Again I wish the day would not come, on the other hand he is looking forward to the whole thing!!Oh boy...sigh!!.

I have a lot of other things to worry about, I was just telling two things concerning one child, there's four others!! Ukuzala kukuzisonga!! LOL

100 things to do before I die

What a coincident, to be writing 100 things I must do before I die, when only this morning I heard of death of a family of three. I bet they all had some things they still wanted to do. 

In one of the weekend papers I read of a 95 year old woman arrested for stealing a horse from a neighbour, she later claimed that riding the neighbour's horse is in her bucket list.

Be sure that my list does not include going to jail! This is not by order, but just as I remember:-
*  tour SA especially Mpumalanga and KZN
*  celebrate 25th anniversary
*  go overseas for holiday
*  host any of my son's graduation party
*  be a General before I retire (not entirely dependent on me)
*  own a company, not neccesarily an events company
*  own a house with a big swimming pool (not a pond)
*  get Masters in PR
*  see all my kids get married and I get to have grandchildren
*  do a guest appearance in a soapie/movie

There you go guys, 10% of 100. I'll finish next time.

Take care!!!

TILL DEATH DO US PART!!

Death is never a good topic to explore, but when tragic death happens, you just can't stop talking about it until the particular loss sinks in. When I joined the department in 1985, this lady was one of the few females in the organisation, an automatic bond developed.

We both got married at almost the same year and we both had three children who are the same age group. I was blessed with three boys and she with two boys and a girl. I had always envied her for having a girl.

I last saw her in December 2010 when I was visiting in PE. We chatted for a long time talking about how grown up our kids are and remembering old times.

This morning I got shocking news of her death, her husband and their last born kid, a daughter. They were on their way to drop the child at school and then to work. It is alleged that the other driver hit them on the side, throwing the girl out and they all died at the scene. The other driver is still critical in hospital.

May their souls rest in peace. It is true that when we leave our houses and homes in the morning, we must be in peace with everybody in the house, because you do not know whether you will see them again. Imagine the two boys who said good bye to their parents and sister, within half n' hour people came to tell them they are now orphans! Life can be cruel sometimes!!

God has a reason for all that He places upon us. I hope and pray these kids find their strenght in GOD!

My big fat BIG dream.

I think it is every parent's dream to see her children become successful in life. I have all other dreams like my 25th anniversary party, getting my BTech qualifications and many many more!

But my big fat BIG dream is to see all my boys become men, not men by only going through initiation, but by completing their studies, get secure jobs and GET MARRIED and before I die, I get to see and have many grand children.

I am afraid to discuss this fat BIG dream of mine with them, because I do not want to put pressure on them. Some kids feel that what their parents wish for them has to be, in order to be a good child they must do what parents wish and say for them (I wish this was really the case). This is MY dream it should not be their burden to fullfil, it must happen if it is meant to be, I PRAY and keep dreaming, who knows, my dreams might come true some day!!.

Positive dreams bring positivity in ones life!!

KEEP DREAMING!

" No Pain, No Gain"

15th September was my husband's birthday. Unfortunately I had to be at work by 05:00, I left the house at 04:30, I even forgot to wish him a happy birthday. Only at about 08:00 I called him. On this day I was at work till 20:00. I managed to go to Canal walk and bought him a gift(not a best choice).

On Sat, 17th without him knowing, I made a booking at a Chinese massage place at Canal Walk. It was a surprise belated birthday gift. I booked for both of us head, neck and back massage. Whilst the Chinese lady was busy with me, she told me that my muscles were in knots I needed "cupping". Figuring that my husband has more on his plate than me, he must be the one more in need of this "cupping", I asked the lady to inform the lady doing my husband to also give him "cupping".

After the massage we went to a restuarant for dinner. On our way he told me that he will never go to those ladies again because they are very rough, he did not enjoy the massage at all. I also did not enjoy it but I thought because he is a man he must have enjoyed the roughness of the Chinese ladies.

One thing for sure, after the massage and cupping I felt the difference, my body felt so light and I slept very well. As much as the ladies are rough, I will still go to them when I really feel stressed, they are good for me. Anyway there is a saying that "No pain, no gain". Overall it was a good night out for just the two of us!!

God Bless You!!