Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Partners for life

To have a partner that is always working away from home is really a difficult task. There are so many things that we read and hear about that break families. In my opinion being away from the family most of the time is one of the recipies for disaster for a family.

I think it takes true commitment to the relationship for any partner to endure loneliness, but that becomes easy to do when you know that the end results will be enjoyed by all in the family, the situation is not only to fulfill one person's ego.

It is good for the one who is away most of the time, to once in a while include the other partner in this other life. The best is to use an opportunity when there is social events, in this way the other partner has a chance to have a taste of what you busy with out there and this can make the partner to be more supportive.

One thing good out of the trip with my husband to Swaziland and the gathering with all those important people that he deals with through his work, its that, every time he comes back home I need to up my game in being hospitable, because I'm in competition with all the hotels that accomodate him. When he goes away, he must miss my home cooking, in any case people say 'you go to a man's heart through his stomach'.

Have a Blessed life!!

The elephant in the room.

I come across a lot of people that have an effect of 'being elephants in the room' in most of my circles which is school, church, work, social events etc. I don't know whether I should include home in my list, the reason is that in my culture my husband has a right to be the elephant in the room in this case our home, but that does not mean I don't give him tough time simply because times have changed.

Being an elephant in the room does nobody an advantage whether its you who assumes the role of being an elephant or your elephant status is imposed on others. When you are an elephant in a room others will reserve their inputs and will not share their thoughts which could have been helpful in the task on hand. On the other hand, you as an elephant you will miss the opportunity of gaining fresh ideas from others. We are supposed to learn from our fellow human being.

'The elephant in the room' tends to create a very stiff and boring environment. Take an example at church, if your Priest has an effect of being the elephant in the room, congegants will not enjoy themselves in church and the youth will feel trapped. Congregants especially the youth need to feel that the church accept them for who they are 'the youngster', while they still need to adhere to church principles.

At work, a person who is 'the elephant in the room', whether its the boss, supervisor or an ordinary colleague, tend to create an unproductive environment. People will reserve their brilliant ideas because the elephant in the room will crush them down, they will also not be creative and innovative because the elephant might not support their initiatives.

If you asked me, we all need to be carefull not to be 'the elephant in the room', its not good for any person. I also think that there are times when I assume the status of being 'the elephant in the room' but in most cases I'm surrounded with people I trust that they have the ability to put me in my rightfull place, because that will help all of us to be a productive team and attain our goals, whether its at my Church, at Work or at my Savings Club.  

Lets be inspired by others and embrace them and their adeas.

God Bless you all!

Monday, June 27, 2011

EVERY DAY IS A GOOD DAY.

Here we are approaching 3rd term of school and saying good bye to a well deserved break. I have been plucking myself to open the blog site and start writing from the 1st week of holidays, but it has been difficult.It has taken a scary incident to push me to finally open the laptop and write. Concerning this incident,in this day and under the circumstances I can say that 'every day is a good day', even this unfortunate situation has made this day a good day, in some tiny way if you look closely.

Of late my face had developed some acne and putting pressure on me were people commenting on it. So I finally made an appointment with a Dermatologist who prescribed antibiotic tablets and a cream. I took one tablet Sat evening and second intake was Sun, last night. 4:00 in the morning  I woke up my body itching like nobody's business.

I then thought its strange cause I just changed bedding the other day! but did not think further why my body was itching. At 5:30 I stood up went to the laundry room, on my way while in the kitchen I felt dizzy and leaned on the counter, the next moment I'm lying on the floor my husband and kids frantic trying to give me air and calling me. I still felt dizzy my whole body feeling like I'm being electric shocked. Beside feeling tired and still itching and with high temperature I was ok. My husband took me to Parow Medicross Medical Centre where I saw a doctor who immediately diagnosed that I'm reacting to a specific antibiotic found in those tablets (I still need to learn by heart the name).

Now here I am in bed for two days, which gives me time to catch-up with my blogs. Don't you think 'every day is a good day', after the scary day I'm achieving something-doing my school work!!

Have good health you guys! and happy read!!

Killing two birds with one stone.

On the 10th of June, we celebrated our 24th anniversary, yee! A month before June my hubby said 'sweety I'm taking you to Swaziland for a weekend for our anniversary', I was so over the moon, my 1st time outside SA borders! I did my passport and he did all bookings, flight and accommodation.

Frid, 17 June, came, off we flew SAA to JHB, then we took a small plane that made me scared from JHB to Swaziland. The journey was so short, I remember they gave us Simba chips and water as I was thinking they're gonna serve afternoon snacks, they announced 'ladies and gentlemen welcome to Swaziland' it was approximately a 35min flight which is way less than driving to George or Knysna!!

The Swazi Royal Spa Hotel is beautiful and fit for a king and a queen. My husband booked us a spa treatment before dinner and we enjoyed it and the ladies were excellent. The following morning he said we should visit an event he knows is taking place at Manzini, when we arrived, there were lots of people, it was actually a 10km charity race but it was time for medals. It was at this event I found that in the evening there will be a charity dinner honouring uMagogo a political stalward.

I said to my husband I don't have a problem but I do not have a dress suitable for the occassion (this was not the truth I had packed something in case, but I was not going to tell him that, seeing the he conveniently forgot to tell me about the whole charity affair). Back at the hotel I saw that there is a botique, so it was time to raid it, husband in tow. I bought a beautiful tiny black number which suits me perfectly as if it was waiting for me in its corner.

The dinner was exellent, we were VIPs seated next to well known business people and politicians. I learnt a lot about ties between SA and Swaziland and about giving back to the community.

So we had our weekend away anniversary and also networked with important people, yes of course I also got a new dress!! Talking about killing not two but three birds with one stone. It was a wonderful getaway, lots to write about, great experience.

Enjoy reading!!







 

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Our greatest strengths are our weaknesses

For this topic I did not have much to think what to write about. For me, its simple, my family i.e my husband and kids are my biggest strength and my biggest weakness. The reason I wake up every morning and go to work is because of them. Because of them, I see a reason for myself to live.

Sometimes I say that, if one of them would die, I will also die, but because there are others that would still be alive, they will be my strength to go on living. They are my life, I live for them.

As I have mentioned above, about if one would die, this means they are my biggest weakness, otherwise why will I want to die also?. Sometimes things I believe in, no longer matter anymore if they clash with my family's welfare. My priorities have now changed, since I had my family, everything I do, every decision I make is based on what impact it will have on them.

My family is my biggest strength and my biggest weakness period!! This is the truth, whether that is bad or not, its my gospel truth!! I know there's a question ' will you commit a crime to save your loved one?, you can answer for yourself??

HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY!

  

TO GIVE, OR NOT TO GIVE

Three days ago I visited home in PE, after reports that my aunt is sick. I know I'm not a doctor, but after all this lady has done for me for as long as I remember,she deserves my full attention, afterall if it was not for her I might not have been the person I am.
The first thing I noticed when I got home was that she has gained weight. I indicated this and she 'blamed' the lady looking after her, she said she cooks a lot and dishes like 'there's no tomorrow'. I laughed and told her she should eat accordingly, she could eat half and eat rest later, instead of finishing all meals.

The next day we went to Livingstone hospital as she was supposed to get results from tests done previously. The results were not good,  doctor indicated that her being overweight complicates her heath more.The doctor recommended healthy eating and walking.She must go back for more tests biopsy, MCG (not 100% sure, but something like that).

Later on I asked her for a list of her groceries so I can go buy them.Hee, what concerned me in her list were the following items, sweets, peanuts, niknaks, stewing beef and other things. When I first saw the list I was like 'Are you kidding me, is this what you buy every month, junk foods?', but I did not ask loud. I went to the shop and I bought everything on the list and added things I felt were healthier and will be easy to cook.

When I told my husband about my aunt's grocery list and what the doctors had said about her weight. He was angry with me saying that I know better, I should have told her no ways and did not buy the junk stuff. I told him that was exactly what I wanted to do, but a lot came to my mind :-
*  When I was growing up,I can't remember her refusing me something I realy wanted.
*  She might think I'm being stingy not buying her 'luxuries' she normally buys for herself.
*  Even if I don't buy junk for her, she will in any case buy them later when I'm gone and she might resent me for disobeying her wish.
*  When I told her of the consequences of eating junk food, she said 'I'm going to die even if I do not eat junk food, let me enjoy eating what I like while I can'.

The big question is, am I justified to let her get away with eating junk even when I know its not good for her health? I think I have no right to deny her the things I know even when I grew up she enjoyed them a lot, (chocolate, sweets, cakes & meat)
I love my aunt so much, I would feel bad to say no to her for anything. I feel at her age she should be enjoying life in any way she so wishes, I'm supposed to give her everything she ask for, afterall that's what she did for me when she raised me.
The lesson I have learnt in all this is that, I must do away with all the bad habits (eating lots of sweets, chocolates &cakes) I inherited from her, otherwise this health crisis will be a cycle (thinking of myself at old age and my kids). Please guys don't say you're still young, take care of yourselves!! LOVE, PEACE & HEALTH!!